Showing posts with label frustrations. Show all posts
Showing posts with label frustrations. Show all posts

Sunday, January 13, 2008

You know what to say...

Love
You know what to say, and you know that you mean it.
I can still hear our conversations in the dark, and I smile every time. I smile everytime and I cry just a bit each time as well.
"It's refreshing to hear your heartbeat again... it's beating faster now."
"If it is, it's all your fault."

It sounds silly, but I have always dreamed of laying in bed, laughing, cuddling, just plain loving... and I got it to come true.
The problem with that is... it's not true every single day. Now my heart is beating faster and faster, and it's all your fault.

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Frustration
So I manage to take some awesome photos in my spare time (hopefully finances will start brewing in). Anywho, when I get totally miffed by good friends of mine, only for someone else to get the well-deserved promotion I've been desperately seeking for, for their average photos, I get bummed and hurt. Not cool, it's like going behind my back.
It's the only thing I have, since the huge part of me that mattered is states away (yes, it's true.), my best friends are on the other side of the state, and the one I live with is a mere stranger now, I have only one thing I am proud of.
Friends are very important to me and when I get hurt like that, it complicates things.
But the more I talked about it over the course of a few days, I figured how utterly ridiculous it sounded.
Call it a girl thing, I don't know. I can overreact sometime, I think I have that right.

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Happiness
Hanging out with good friends more and more, and creating some awesome memories and inside jokes... well, it deems good for my health, me thinks. And the more I have fun with the current friends that make me smile, the more it doesn't upset me that my unreliable best friend continues to disappoint me.
I went to the bowling alley last night to an event called the Hot Rodder's Ball. I drank myself retarded, got dizzy, played a game for free, hugged a lot of people, took a lot of pictures, and saw some awesome people I haven't seen in awhile.
ALL THE WHILE, I started up a band with a singer friend of mine. Go figure! We'll see how this works out.

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Perseverance
So I'm going to research some classes at a couple of the schools here this week (for sure, I'm not just saying it this time)... I'm not sure what for, but I gotta get goin' on that aspect and figure out what the hell I want to do. I love going to school, to be honest. I procrastinate horribly, but I still love going. I don't want to work at stupidfuck jobs for the rest of my life.