So I think

I'm going to give that reclusive church mouse thing a go. It might do me some good. Spend some solo time outside, taking pictures, reading books in a park (what park is good for that in Grand Rapids? I have yet to find out.), hatching out a real plan for my future without the lecturing from brutally honest friends, drawing more, working, organizing, scheming, traveling alone, writing snail mail letters, gardening (I'm tapping into my geriatric roots already), going for walks at night, driving to Grand Haven when I'm upset and just chill out on the beach and regroup my thoughts, move on from what my heart wants (be happy), worry less, laugh more, pick out a damn career already, meet new people, smile and nod.

What I fear is that I am only willing to bet that this will last a mere few days before someone asks me what the fuck is wrong with me. Or, before I stumble backward into square one. We'll see, I'm up for a challenge.

Let me know how the fuck you all are. I've become far too dependent on what's going on in other people's lives than my own nowadays.